Givers Takers & Matchers



Few years back in a networking event I learnt the golden principles of GIVERS GAIN! Yes your guess is absolutely correct it was a BNI event with Dr. Ivan Misner. BNI is a great networking forum that propagates the GIVERS GAIN Principles. Even in our ancient scriptures and mythologies giving has always been held at the highest esteem, sharing caring and prosperity are always in the same order of action to create a path of never ending flow of blessings in life.


Adam Grant's book GIVE and TAKE: A Revolutionary approach to Success is a great book and sure highlights more on the effectiveness of giving. Grant is an organizational psychologist with The Wharton School, where he researched and studied why some people are successful while others are not... what the answer revealed was surprising, yet true in our day to day witnessing of life... that its the givers who succeed the most.


The best teachers give most to the students, the best athletes give more to their sport, the best businesses provide the most value, the best entrepreneurs give the best to their cause, the best in everything is always about how we give our best to it.

9 researched and validated actions, according to Adam Grant, that you can do to be a successful giver in life are:

  1. Test Your Giver Quotient - We often live in a feedback vacuum, totally oblivious of the results of our actions. Best way of getting more awareness about your actions is to ask or even put yourself in the shoes of the other who you are interacting with.

  2. Run a Reciprocity Ring - A reciprocity ring is where a small focus group of 15 -30 people get together for 20 minutes in an organization to support each other. More like a master-mind where people support each other. Each person presents a request to the group members, who make contributions, using their knowledge, resources, and connections to help fulfill the request. BNI sure is a perfect example where in a 30 secs the person gets to project the services provided and then later they position their ASK as an expert. However the mindset of the members in this regard needs to be sacrosanct to be able to leverage best advantage for self and others!!!

  3. Help Other People Craft Their Jobs - People often end up working on tasks that aren’t perfectly aligned with their interests and skills. A powerful way to give is to help others work on tasks that are more interesting, meaningful, or developmental. Great supervisors spend time in understanding and conversing with their team members to evaluate the roles and responsibilities which their teams are naturally passionate about.

  4. Peer Recognition process - In many organizations, givers go unrecognized. To combat this problem, organizations are introducing peer recognition programs to reward people for giving in ways that leaders and managers rarely see. Organizations like Google -Southwest Airlines, Zappos are companies which have introduced this peer recognition system. Linden Lab, founder of Second Life promoted the use of a system called LOVE MACHINE for employees to recognise each other.

  5. Embrace the Five-Minute Favor - Ask people what they need and look for ways to help at a minimal personal cost, such as giving honest feedback and making an introduction. Here’s a simple exercise to get started as a connector. In social platforms today, you can simply like somebody's idea to begin your 5 second favor.

  6. Practice Powerless Communication. Becoming a giver often requires a change in habits—from talking to listening, self-promoting to advice-seeking, and advocating to inquiring. In coaching as per ICF guidelines the coaching shouldn't be speaking more than 20% of the time; very well thought out mandate that supports the best outcomes in coaching conversations. Many times, you can have bigger impact if you know what to ask, rather than knowing what to say. For more on the power of powerless communication, do look up The Introverted Leader: Building on Your Quiet Strength

  7. Launch a Personal Generosity Experiment- Start on your own with a giving and sharing that doesn't exhaust you and makes you feel satisfied that you are in abundance of prosperity -knowledge and whatever you are sharing...same thing starts multiplying with a weird coincidence. For example you can start by wearing a SMILE, sharing knowledge -information, stories anything which you are good at.

  8. Join a forum of GIVERS -The fastest way to adopt the right principles is joining the practitioners who practice the art every single day. This also supports you in terms of building the reciprocity factor with them.

  9. Seek Help More Often- NEVER shy away from asking, you may be surprised with the support you are given. When you ask for help, you’re not always imposing a burden...some people are givers and are happy to support.

So what do you think you are GIVER-TAKER -MATCHER...Is it helping you work with others on a WINWIN basis?

Want to know more about your style, take the assessment below:

https://testyourself.psychtests.com/testid/2097

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